may 09

And so, i vanished from blogosphere for about a week, and ppl are starting to ask me what's going on.. seriously. it isn't that surprising considering that i am running dry on creative juices, and am also not in the best of moods.

somehow, my planned weekend didn't turn out to what i wanted it to be. i wanted to go away, from the people, from the chaos and turmoils, and have a great escapade. i wanted to search from my 'shangri-la', for both my physical and mental well being.. but i guess man can plan, but essentially, it all lies with the powers that be.

however, all was not lost as i managed to learn a great deal out of my wandering. i didn't manage to reach my goal. perhaps it's time for me to let go, and not let perfection dictate my way of life. i've also learned that eventually, the journey is mine, and mine alone. only i will take those steps, only i will walk the path.. and i have learned, that i shall walk alone. i may have fallen, or faced with danger, but eventually, i walk alone. i don't need anybody alongside to guide me, to be with me... and lastly, i steeled my will, and realised that all other things don't matter to me now. i will be above and beyond the present.

also, for the first time, i walked in the rain, being drenched through and through. i have never done it, but i guess, i did it. and now, i am ready to take the chance that i have set upon, and never look back. that spares a lot of confusion, misunderstanding and suffering from everybody.

finally, i was pulled by to reality by attending the dinner arranged by my friends. seriously, i didn't want to go. and i don't wanna make a big deal out of it.. but i guess they just can't let it rest. and so, we ate, we laughed and they were all happy..

anyway, just some food for thought.. does it matter if i don't make a wish when i blow out the candles?? after all, they are just candles. besides, wishes won't come true for me.

on happier events.. workload is increasing as we speak. i'm slated to host an event, and coordinate another conference. at the same time, writing research papers is also taking a toll on me. but i guess i won't give up!!hehe

well, so much for this post
ciao