post 201: reflections

so, another year of my life is fast coming to an end. i guess the old adage, your twenties fly by really fast, holds some truth in it. and probably it's also human nature to evaluate oneself, do some inner reflections, and learning..

i remembered, one year ago, this time, i just came back from Celine's concert. for me,that was the best experience that i ever had. and i was still a uni boy, getting ready for my viva, thesis and all..

however, look at how things have changed in the past year. i've gone from uni undergrad to working professional. although i'm not in some huge corporate company, i feel blessed to have this job. this job has opened up so many different avenues for me, and allowed me to see the world in a different perspective. it has also shown me how things work, allowing me to make a change in my state, and also allowed me to develop better skills and knowledge. although i aspire to become an environmental consultant/auditor now, it doesn't mean that i am ungrateful to what i have now.

next, i've gone from a normal gym member to an internationally certified instructor for bodybalance. all done within a year. i would say that the certificate was probably the best birthday present that i have given myself in all these years. who would have guessed that i actually took a certain passion to another level.

in a way, i am also thankful that i have not fallen to temptations over the past year. although i was nearly tempted by the devil, i managed to save myself, and protect my chastity. i guess it's a blessing for me to retain my sanctity and purity, and not allow myself to be defiled. true, there were turbulent times and a huge emotional roller coster, i am so thankful that everything went well, and i can still hold my head up high.

however, there are some things that i feel have fallen short of my expectations. firstly, there was a certain period of time when i have allowed myself to be ruled by emotions. i tore down the walls that surrounded me and guarded me, to allow myself to be vulnerable. however, this year, i shall try my best to rebuild and reinforce the walls that i have around me, never allowing them to crumble!!

next, i'm also a little disappointed that i haven't found the courage to leave all material attachments behind me, and leave my family to become a monk. instead, i have allowed more and more materials to possess and tie me down to this earth. i have more responsibilities, more gadgets etc to retain me..

third, i haven't been able to fully dedicate myself to a good cause. although i am now a member with the friends of the botanic gardens, and also mns, i haven't really been hands on to give back to the community, and my passion, the animals. i haven't found the opportunity to volunteer my services to SPCA or any orphanages. i was crudely reminded of this two days ago, when i was in the children's protection society and also seeing a few stray dogs when i driving past mount erskine road...

i guess that's all for the moment, as that's what i had in mind before i passed out in bed.

my latest determintion is to lose more weight (brandon, u are my idol)
ciao