dry tears never flow

this is gonna be a side diversion from the phoenix saga (that i am writing once in a blue moon, when my muse is here). back to the mundane, moody, emo life of mine (haha.. me/emo...so weird)

to begin with, launch of les mills classes.. i think this will be the last time that i am going for bodystep. really hate those kiasu attitude of the ppl. if only we could stage a boycott, and oust those ppl..
as for balance, turn out wasn't as good as expected. well, who am i to expect anything anyway. just teach, smile and leave.
the saving grace, body jam. it's not that bad. guess my first impression was wrong. lesson learnt. never judge a jam class by sitting by the side during quarterly sessions.

am having trouble getting better sleep these days.. feels like i'm stuck in a rut, and i have no way of getting out. in fact, i think i am gasping for breathes, drowning in my own problems (of the mind).. i may need to see a shrink. in fact, i think catharsis will help to free my tear ducts and just let it pour all out. once and for all.

just found out something that i've been kept in the dark for a while. is the good or is this bad, i am not sure. probably, as they say, ignorance is bliss.

i guess i finally saw what i have been trying to hide from, and i guess i have to acknowledge it. it's not worth my attention, and it's pretty obvious. am a little disappointed with myself for trying to look beyond it.things are just not meant to be.try as i might, but i'll never make it through.

will have to perfect my practise for this year. i have failed the last year, and realising that i haven't diverted much, there is still some saving grace. after all, i have another 3 more months to go before the end of the year. come next year, must bring it to another level, where no mistakes are even permitted.

enough for the moment while i go wallow in my own sorrow..

ciao