crossroads

again, i find myself confunded by hecate's schemes. i am standing at the crossroads again, wondering what to do. which path should i take, and which journey will be the best for me. i know for certain that all of them will eventually lead me to the realm of hades, but i certainly want to take the road that is least painful and least hurtful.

a month. apart from the first time, there is nothing left. probably lust works stongest when you first meet. it will eventually die off, leaving you nothing but a sad memory. although we've been out together so many times, i fail to notice my retaining power. i fail to see how am i going to maintain you. i know that money is certainly buying your love now, but where do we go when the money ends. am i, but just a fool??

i have to keep on being something that i am not, just to ensure that you will be happy. just to ensure that you will be with me. but is this worth it?? will i never get to wear my heart on my sleeve anymore? or will i never get to admire myself anymore?? i always wonder about the end of the day. well, i guess i should be wondering so much, consider the day has already ended when we meet.

learning to let go. probably i should do so when i still love you. they say, short term pain is much better than a prolonged pain. probably we should just break it off when the time is still favourable. but how do i bring myself to tell this to you? i don't wanna lose a friend. but i don't wanna lose my senses and my life.

hair. eyes. arms. body. leg. hair. torso

there is nothing that i can do now but humbly surrender myself to the will of the powers that be. i guess i am ready to take the challenge. i am, but a small piece of rook in this ever big game of chess..

ciao