Raining..

gosh, it's been raining for the whole day. really brought me down to the dumps. i don't know what is wrong with me, but this sick feeling is really bringing me down. maybe it's the weather, maybe it's me project, or maybe it's my hormones (guys have hormonal fluctuations too). i just don't know...

actually, my project is nearing completion. i've already written half of my thesis.. now, all's left is my fatty acid analysis, and also to write my results and discussion. wish me luck so that i can get it done before the deadline.

i guess the rain also dampen my spirits in whole. i didn't do much today, except to attend a mis-informed class (at 10). then, i decided not to go for class at 2. what's worse, i didn't even bother going to the gym. there's 90 minutes of yoga (my fav), but i just didn't bother. eventually, i ended up taking a long nap from 3 to 6. even so, i can still feel the lethargy in my bones now.

emotionwise, it is still in turmoil. i thought i had clear signs. really clear signs. but my heart wouldn't listen. it's causing me hurt, and the timing is bad as i really wanna focus on my studies. i thought we had so much in common, but all those are illusions. we may not have started, but still, is this the end?? hmm..maybe it's a blessing to have you only as a friend. or maybe loneliness is the only company desired.. i don't know.

elections are coming.. banners, buntings and billboards everywhere. politicians are going around, campaining for votes. but, what a pity that i couldn't vote. don't get me wrong, i am registered, but just a little too late. guess it's another 4 years then. anyway, i really hope that there'll be a politician that will highlight the environment as one of their agenda. i see all these manifestoes.. yet none touched on conserving, preserving, or maybe even paying a little attention to the natural world around them... makes me wonder, are they even worth being voted for??

i just can't wait for the celine dion concert tickets. gosh, they can't even get the pricing right now... come on, ppl!!

i am also now stuck in a rut considering my future options. i was browsing through the graduate studies in upm. do i wanna continue my studies in upm? or should i stay in usm? or maybe i should head over to the igp (or whatever, that deals with australian studies) and consider relocating to australia?? i dunno. or maybe, i'll just get a job. what about my training... i wanna take balance. but should i take jam?? ppl have been telling me to take jam, but should i? ah.. questions, questions, questions...

guess i'll just sleep on this.. and await a new dawn.
ciao
je t'aime
ben